<div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">몇년전 1200만원 가량의 빚을 갚았는데 도로 2천만원 빚이 생기고 직장도 없고</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">대학교도 잘리고 사는게 참 이상해서 죽을 생각을 했던 적이 있어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 그때 당시 단칸방에서 강아지 없이 혼자 살았기 때문에</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">죽어야겠다 </span><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">마음 먹는 순간 다 쉽더라고요 일단 집을 다 치웠어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">컴퓨터 포맷까지 하고</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">100리터짜리 쓰레기봉투 사서 내가 죽었을때 남은 절대 안봤으면 좋겠다싶은건 다 담아서 버렸습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">이제 죽으려고 보니까 이런 반지하 단칸방에서 시체로 발견되기가 너무 싫은거예요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">누가 내 시체를 수습한다고 보는것도 싫고..</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그래서 아무도 내 시체 찾지 못하세 산에서 투신을 하자 생각 했습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 그때 가족들이랑 다 연락을 끊고 살아서 죽게 되면 오랜시간 찾아줄 사람이 없었어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">친구들이 있긴 하지만 제가 연락을 지속적으로 유지하는 사람이 아니라서</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">연락이 끊겨도 그러러니 하는 친구들이었고..</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그래서 그냥 아예 못찾아버리게 죽자 생각해버렸습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그때 당시 전재산이 2만원이었어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그 돈으로 당일 터미널에서 가장 늦은 시간 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">새벽 12시에 출발해 새벽 3시에 도착하는 백무동행 고속버스를 예매했습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">지리산으로 가는 버스였어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">지리산에서 떨어져 죽자 그렇게 됐습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">터미널에서 표를 끊고 버스에 올라탔는데 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">여기서 1차로 당황하게 됩니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">평일인데도 등산을 가시는 분들이 <span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">엄청 많아서 버스가 거의 만원버스인거예요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">전 새벽 버스라 저 혼자 탈줄 알았거든요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 죽으러 가는데 여행을 떠나는 사람과 한 버스에 섞여 지리산으로 출발을 했습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">새벽 고속버스에서 무슨 생각을 하며 백무동까지 내려왔는지 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">지금은 정확히 기억이 나지 않지만</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">아마도 내 인생은 어디서 부터 잘못됐을까? 하는 생각에 빠져있었겠죠 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">새벽 3시가 조금 넘은 시간에 버스는 백무동에 도착을 했습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">버스에 함께 탔던 등산객들은 정류소 근처 저마다의 숙소들로 흩어졌고</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 그 어두운 새벽의 지리산으로 향하는 길을 걷기 시작했습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">얼마 걷지 않아 산길이 <span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">시작되었어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">포장도로를 걸을땐 앞이 보였는데 산속으로 들어가니 온통 새까맣고 바로 발밑조차 보이지가 않았습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">지금 다시 가라그러면 못가요 무서워서...</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그때는 죽을 생각에 겁대가리를 완전히 상실했던거죠 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">얕은 곳에서 죽으면 쉽게 발견될테니 깊은 곳에서 죽을 생각이었습니다 해뜨기 전에요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">느릿느릿 산길을 계속 올랐습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 그때 아무 생각이 없어서 뒤에서 어떤 노부부가 따라 올라오는걸 모르고 있었어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">새벽등산을 오신건지 머리에 랜턴을 쓰고 계셨는데 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">척척 올라오시다가 어둠속에서 제가 보이자 크게 놀라셨는지</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">아주머니께서는 비명을 지르셨습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">귀신을 본줄 알았대요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">아주머니가 심장을 부여잡고</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">"학생 이 시간에 그러고 온거야? 랜턴도 없이 여기를 어떻게 올라가? 혼자 온거야?" 하고 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저에게 여러소리를 하셨어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 죽으러 왔기 때문에 이런 관심들이 다 성가시고 짜증나고 불편하고...</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그냥 노부부가 알아서 갈길을 가주었으면 좋겠다고 생각했습니다</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">걱정이 많으신 아주머니가 해뜰때까지만 같이 가자고 말을 하시길래 저는 괜찮다고 했습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그러자 아주머니 옆에 남편분이 머리에 쓰고 있던 랜턴을 벗어 저에게 주셨어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> 랜턴 없으면 큰일 나니까 이거 쓰고 가라고 나는 집사람 랜턴 빛 따라 가면 된다고...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">이때까지만 해도 저는 이 호의가 참 <span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">불편하고 짜증나고 싫었습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">죽으러 가는데 괜히 목격자 만든 것 같고 귀찮고 간섭받는 것 같았거든요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 됐다고 했습니다 앞 보이니까 괜찮다고..</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그래도 굳이 굳이 제 손에 쥐어주고 산행 조심히하라고 말씀하시더니</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">제가 불편해하는게 보였는지 먼저 가시더라고요..</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 손에 랜턴만 달랑 들고 </span><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">다시 산을 올랐습니다</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">앞서 가던 노부부는 종종 저를 돌아보시는 것 같았어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 끝내 랜턴을 키지 않았습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그렇다고 버리지는 못하고 손에 쥐고만 있었어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">한 2시간쯤 올라갔을까요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">해가 조금 밝아서 앞이 조금씩 보이기 시작했어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 힘든줄도 모르고 계속 걸었습니다 슬슬 적당한 곳을 </span><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">찾아야 했어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">사람이 다니지 않는 길을 유심히 둘러보는데 숙식이 가능한 대피소가 얼마 남지 않았다는 표지판을 봤어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">생각보다 높이 올라왔더라고요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">대피소 말고 다른 곳으로 가야겠다 생각을 하고 걸음을 돌렸는데 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">하필 그 길이 오랜 등산을 해오신분들에게 대피소와 열결된 지름길로 알려진 길이 </span><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">었던겁니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">지름길인만큼 엄청 험하고 경사지고 위험했어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 지름길인걸 모르니 그냥 사람이 다니지 않은 길이라 험하구나 생각했습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">아직 죽을 곳이 마땅치않아 계속 걷다보니 대피소에 도착을 했습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그때 저는 2차 당황을 하고 맙니다 새벽 6시 정도 됐는데 대피소에 사람이 바글바글한겁</span><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">니다</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">라면 끓여먹는 사람들 세수 양치하는 사람들...</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 알수없이 밀려오는 짜증과 허탈함에 잠깐 바위에 걸터 앉아 쉬었습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">이 산은 어딜가도 사람이 있었어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">주말도 아닌데 말이예요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">어디서 죽나 어떻게 죽나 사실 나 죽는거 무서워서 계속 사람을 핑계로 걷는건 아닐까 그런 생각들이 들었어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">죽어야지 죽어서 끝내야지 다시 그 생각을 하고 일어났습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">죽을 용기를 냈어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> 다시 산 위로 오르는 길을 걷는데 대피소에서 막 나오신 아주머니 세네분이 저를 보고 말을 걸었어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">"학생 그러고 여기까지 올라왔어? 혼자 온거야?" </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 죽으러 왔기 때문에 그냥 반팔티에 검은바지에 운동화가 <span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">다였어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">등산 가방도 없고 스틱도 없고 양말조차 발목양말에 물통하나 들고있지 않았거든요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">제 몰골이 누가봐도 등산하는 몰골은 아니었는지 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">아주머니들이 어떻게 그러고 여기까지 왔느냐고 젊어서 좋다고 막 그러셨어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는...네...또 귀찮고 짜증나고 싫었습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그때 아주머니 한분이 가방을 여시</span><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">더니 포장도 뜯지 않은 등산양말 새것과 500리터짜리 물을 저에게 주셨어요 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">양말 그런거 신고 올라가면 발톱 다 빠진다고 발 다 상한다고...</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">물도 여기는 약수터가 없으니까 이것 마시라고...</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 또 괜찮다고 했습니다 </span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그런데 랜턴을 쥐고 있는 손에 억지로 양말과 물통을 쥐어주시는겁니다</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 분명 빈손으로 올라왔는데 벌써 양손에는 랜턴과 양말 그리고 물이 생겨버렸습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">또 다른 아주머니께서는 초코바와 마가렛뜨 과자까지 주셨어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">"우리 딸래미는 등산 가자고 백날을 말해도 따라오지 않는데 혼자 등산도 오고 기특하다"</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">같은 말까지 해주시면서요...참 이상하죠 세상이...</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 양손에 많은 것들을 들고 다시 걷기 시작했습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">여전히 죽고싶었지만 날은 밝고 말았어요 7시 아침이 된겁니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">이제 다니는 산길마다 사람들이 있었어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">근데요 그 사람들이 모든 등산객을 마주칠때마다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">"안녕하세요? 안전 산행하세요" 같은 인사를 주고 받는 겁니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">눈을 일부러 마주치지 않아도 사람들은 저에게 안전산행 하라고 웃어주며 인사를 건넸어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">어떤 사람은 정상이 얼마 남지 않았으니 힘내라고 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">오늘 날이 좋아서 정상 가면 절경이라고 혼자 떠들기까지 했습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 죽을 수가 없었어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">자<span style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">꾸 사람을 봐서 그런가 해가 떠서 그런가 죽을 수가 없었어요</span></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">결국 정상까지 올라가고 말았습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">등산객들을따라 저는 지리산 정상에 올랐어요 죽고 싶긴 했지만 죽고 싶지 않았어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">천왕봉 위가 아름다웠어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">정말 아름다웠습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">꼭 현실이 아닌 것 같이..</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">돌 위에 가만히 앉아 아래 펼쳐진 산의 능선들과 구름을 바라보았어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">하염없이 바라봤습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그때 열댓분씩 무리지어 등산 온 중년아저씨와 아주머니께서 저에게 사진을 찍어줄 수 있느냐고 물어봤습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">천왕봉 풍경에 빠져있던 저는 흔쾌히 까진 아니지만 짜증이나 귀찮은 모양 없이 사진을 찍어드리기로 했습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">사진을 다 찍어드리고 휴대폰을 드릴 때 아주머니 한분이 저에게</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">"학생은 혼자왔어? 학생도 찍어 내가 찍어줄게" 라고 했습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 죽으러 왔기때문에 휴대폰을 배터리와 분리해(노트4쓰던 시절) 놓은 상태였어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">죽기전 각각 멀리 던져버릴 계획이었습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 괜찮다고 했어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그러자 아주머니가 사진 안찍긴 너무 아깝다고 그러시는 겁니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">남는게 사진이라고</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">저는 끝내 거절을 해서 사진은 찍지 않았지만 아주머니와 아저씨 무리가 돌아간 뒤...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그 정상에 몇시간을 홀로 앉아있었습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">올라오는 이 내려가는 이 모두를 지켜보고 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">내 인생을 돌아보고 결국 휴대폰 전원을 켜고 지리산의 풍경을 찍었습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">이 순간 저는 죽기로 한 마음을 모두 접어버렸어요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;">그때 찍었던 사진입니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"><br></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;font-family:Dotum, '돋움', 'Apple SD Gothic Neo', sans-serif;"> <div style="text-align:left;"><img src="http://thimg.todayhumor.co.kr/upfile/202007/1595818205465fe3c6782a4d30b5166027af02e79d__mn422209__w680__h382__f37830__Ym202007.jpg" width="680" height="382" alt="1738a1dbdf912d779.jpeg" style="border:none;" filesize="37830"></div> <div style="text-align:left;"><br></div> <div style="text-align:left;"><br></div> <div style="text-align:left;"> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">죽을 마음이 사라지자 배가 고팠습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">밥이 먹고 싶었어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">정상에는 아침 8시에 도착했는데 내려가려고 보니 오후 2시였습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그 긴 시간동안 저는 저 풍경을 바라보며 죽을 용기를 죽였어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 산에서 내려가기로 했습니다 살아서 내려기로 했어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">아주머니가 주신 등산양말을 신었습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그런데 한가지...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 전재산을 털고 죽기 위해 이곳에 온지라 집에 돌아갈 돈이 없었어요...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">지리산에서 내려와 터미널로 향하는 버스정류소에서 저는 아무 생각이 없어져버렸습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">돈이 없어서 집으로 돌아갈 수 없다니...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그냥 죽을걸...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">하는 생각이 울컥 났던것 같기도 해요 1시간을 앉아있었을까요</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">버스정류소 뒤 주차장에 있던 아저씨가 저에게 말을 걸었습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">"어디까지 가냐고 태워줄테니 타라고" </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"><br style="max-width:100%;"></div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 평소 아저씨들과 말섞기를 그다지 좋아하지 않아 원래같았으면 무시했겠지만 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">집에 너무 너무 가고 싶었어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 서울에 가야하는데 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">돈이 부족하다라고 솔직하게 털어놓았습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">아저씨는 대전사람이었어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저를 차에 태워 터미널까지 가서 서울행 버스티켓까지 직접 끊어주셨습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">참...참 이상한 하루였어요 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 아저씨께 버스표를 받으며 그날 처음으로 고맙다는 말을 했습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">랜턴을 주신 부부와 대피소의 아주머니와 이 아저씨 덕분에 저는 살아서 집에 갈 수 있었습니다</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">여전히 세상은 이상하고</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">저는 요즘도 가끔씩 왜 세상이 나에게만 야박하고 나를 못살게 굴어 안달인지 화가 나는 경우가 있습니다 </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">그런데 죽을용기는 나지 않습니다..</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">죽다 살아났기 때문인지 몰라도..</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">힘이 되는 이야기인지는 모르겠지만 지리산에 올라야했던 저와 같은 충동을 느끼시는 분들에게...</div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;"> </div> <div style="margin:0px;padding:0px;border:0px;background:transparent;max-width:100%;">조금이나마 컴다운을 할 수 있는 기회가 되었으면..좋겠습니다 그럼 이만..</div></div><br></div>